Woofs to all!

My name is Pawfessor Dexter and I is here to help.

My hoomum is a Professor of Hoomanity (she calls it cycle-ogy, but that is a stoopid name – who wants to understand the mind of a cycle?! All they do is go whoosh past, and they is not even for chasing! I call its Hoomanity because it is about understanding hoomans.). I is a very clever doggo, so I is a Pawfessor of Dognamity.

My hoomum and I have noticed that there is lots of sad doggos in shelters all over the world. But we all know that there is no such thing as a bad dog! I also think that there is no such thing as a bad hooman. So why do so many hoomans give away their doggos? Me and my hoomum think that this might be because some hoomans and some doggos just don’t understand each other. And we want to help with this.

For the first time EVER (probably), I is going to give you a dogs-eye view into the doggo world of me and my friends. And my huumom is going to tell you all about the cycle-ogy behinds our good advice. I is going to tell you all abouts:

  • Why pull on the lead, even though you told me not to
  • Why I absolutely have to run over to that dog three miles away in the park and won’t come back even when you turn that funny shade of purple screaming my name
  • Why I stole your sausage off the counter last night and I’m not even sorry
  • Why fireworks and binbags and the umbrella that was fine yesterday is super scary today
  • Why I pee on your nice clean carpet even though the door to the garden is open and just two feet away
  • Why the magic lead transforms me from a cuddle-bug in the house to a lunging vicious monster in the street

This is not a course – they is boring. And this does not cost any pennies – all pennies should be saved for treatos. This is just some good advice from a Professor of Humanity and a Pawfessor of Dognamity to help all the doggos!

Why your dog is not trying to be alpha

An image of Dexter playing

First and most important… I is not trying to be alpha. I is very happy being Dexter. I do not want to be the boss or dominant or alpha or anything else. I doesn’t even know what all of that means! I just want to do things that makes me happy.

If I eats your dinner that you left on the side, it’s not because I is being alpha. It’s becoz your dinner smelt yummy.

If I refuse to move when I am sleeping across a doorway, it’s not because I is being alpha. It’s because I is super comfy and super lazy.

If I pull on the lead or shove you out of the way to get in front of you, it’s not because I is being alpha. It’s because I is super excited and want to get there fast.

If I jump up and try to hump you, it’s not because I is being alpha. It’s because I like humping – it feels nice and I am excited (yep, even when my doggy bits have gone)!

Doggo Wrestling

Doggo Wrestling

My human thought my doggo friend and me was fighting but we woz only playing doggo wrestling – it’s lots of fun. Sometimes we bite each other for a laugh – it didn’t make my human laugh though – she was barking at me. I think she wanted to join in but she doesn’t like getting muddy like what I do. I usually win at doggo wrestle matches but if I don’t think I’m going to win I show my belly to end the game.